Escape to Paradise: Kuching's Memoire Hornbill Hotel Awaits!
Okay, buckle up, buttercups! Because we're diving headfirst into the jungle (metaphorically, of course) of the Memoire Hornbill Hotel in Kuching. Escape to Paradise: Kuching's Memoire Hornbill Hotel Awaits! That's the promise, right? Let's see if it delivers, and if so, if it’s worth your hard-earned moolah.
(Disclaimer: This review is based on information provided. My personal experience? Well, I didn't personally stay there, so I'm drawing from the details. But let’s pretend I did and that I’m a wonderfully opinionated, slightly scatterbrained travel blogger.)
Accessibility: The Great Balancing Act
Okay, first things first. Accessibility. It's a biggie. And from what I can gather, the Hornbill Hotel tries. They tick some boxes: Elevator, Facilities for disabled guests. That's good! But the devil is in the details. Are the bathrooms truly accessible? The corridors wide enough? This is where I'd love to have more specific details. If you have mobility issues, call the hotel directly and grill them about specifics. Don't take their word for it! Make sure it fits your definition of accessible. And the fact that they’re just trying is…well, it's better than nothing, I guess.
Getting Around: The Lay of the Land
Airport transfer is a definite plus! Landing in a strange city, especially if jet-lagged, is a no-brainer to book something. Car park [free of charge], Car park [on-site], Valet parking…they’ve got the parking situation covered. They even have that fancy Car power charging station – good for the eco-conscious traveller! Taxi service? Yep. So getting around Kuching looks pretty sorted.
Cleanliness and Safety: The New Norm
Alright, let’s get real. Covid changed everything. And the Hornbill seems to be taking it seriously. Anti-viral cleaning products, Daily disinfection in common areas, Individually-wrapped food options, Physical distancing of at least 1 meter, Professional-grade sanitizing services, Room sanitization opt-out available, Rooms sanitized between stays, Safe dining setup, Sanitized kitchen and tableware items, Staff trained in safety protocol, Sterilizing equipment. That’s a lot of buzzwords, but hey, I'm glad to see it. Hand sanitizer is available, and they offer Doctor/nurse on call, First aid kit. Good on ya, Hornbill. This is a solid attempt to make you feel safe.
Rooms: Your Sanctuary, or Not?
Let’s get into the nitty-gritty. The rooms sound… decent! Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes, Coffee/tea maker, Free bottled water, Hair dryer, In-room safe box, Internet access – wireless, Laptop workspace, Mini bar, Satellite/cable channels, Separate shower/bathtub, Slippers, Smoke detector, Wi-Fi [free] – the basics are there. Extra long bed? Score! I hate short beds. Blackout curtains are a must, and they are offered, thank goodness! Non-smoking rooms? Yes! (Take note, smokers!). Bathrooms are listed as having Additional toilet. Hmmm… is this to boast better toilet coverage? The important thing is you have a Private bathroom and the Toiletries provided. The inclusion of a Window that opens is a welcome touch that adds a bit of natural air. Let’s hope for decent views too!
Food, Glorious Food (and Drink!)
Okay, this is where things get interesting. The Hornbill seems to have cast a wide net. Restaurants, coffee shop, snack bar, pool bar, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Western cuisine in restaurant, vegetarian restaurant … they're trying to cover all the bases. Breakfast [buffet]! Good for the hungry traveller. A buffet. I always get too excited at buffets and then overeat. The Breakfast takeaway service is a nice touch if you are trying to get an early start. Room service [24-hour] is a lifesaver, you never know when you might have a craving for food and the kitchen is all yours for the night!
Dining down: The Buffet Battle
(I'm going off on a tangent here, sorry!) One thing I need to know about buffets: Is the food actually good? If it’s the lukewarm, mystery-meat variety, then… pass. But if it’s fresh, flavorful, and with a decent selection of local dishes, then sign me up! I'm imagining a table laden with fresh fruit, fluffy roti canai and sambal, aromatic rice and a stunning curry! If you like your coffee in the morning, then the Coffee/tea in restaurant offering is a great thing in its early hours.
Services and Conveniences: The Little Things
Concierge, Daily housekeeping, Luggage storage, Laundry service, Dry cleaning, Currency exchange, Cash withdrawal, – they've thought of the important stuff! Air conditioning in public area? Vital in the Malaysian heat. They even offer Food delivery, which is a bonus. They also have a Convenience store, great if you forgot your toothbrush or need a midnight snack.
Things to Do/Ways to Relax: Spa-tacular or… Not?
Okay, this is where the Hornbill either shines or falls flat. They boast a Spa, a Fitness center, sauna, steamroom, swimming pool, pool with view… Sounds promising, right? But let's break it down. A Body scrub and Body wrap make me sound like this hotel is on my bucket list for relaxation. The Gym/fitness should be well equipped, and the Massage offering will have to be a good quality one. The Foot bath… okay, I need this. The Spa/sauna is a must! The Swimming pool [outdoor] is what you want, right? But what’s the vibe? Is it a serene oasis, or a noisy, crowded free-for-all? Again, more specifics are needed. Is the pool actually beautiful? Does the spa offer treatments that feel truly luxurious?
For the Kids: Family-Friendly Fun?
Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal… the Hornbill clearly aims to cater to families. Okay, the Kids meal is great, but what’s on the menu? Is it the usual processed chicken nuggets and fries, or are there some healthier options? Let’s give credit where it’s due, they did mention Family/child friendly which is quite nice.
Business Traveler? They've Got You Covered.
Audio-visual equipment for special events, Business facilities, Indoor venue for special events, Luggage storage, Meeting/banquet facilities, Meetings, Meeting stationery, Outdoor venue for special events, Projector/LED display, Seminars, Xerox/fax in business center… they do try and cater to business travellers. If you're in Kuching on business, it looks like the Hornbill Hotel is equipped to host your meetings and events.
Overall Impression: The Verdict (Maybe?)
The Memoire Hornbill Hotel appears to offer a solid, if not spectacular, experience. It has a good range of facilities, seems to take cleanliness and safety seriously, and caters to a variety of travelers. BUT… it lacks that "wow" factor. The descriptions are often generic. The details are sparse. A truly great hotel review needs to evoke an experience.
My Honest (And Slightly Unhinged) Opinion:
Is it paradise? Probably not. But is it a decent base for exploring Kuching? Potentially. It seems like a solid option if you're looking for a comfortable stay with a variety of amenities. It's not going to blow your mind, but it probably won't disappoint either. The key is to do your research!
Here’s the Deal: Escape to Kuching, But Be Savvy!
The Offer (My Slightly Crazy Take):
Book your escape to the Memoire Hornbill Hotel within the next 72 hours and get a FREE (and I mean free) upgrade to a room with a view (subject to availability, naturally!). Plus, I’m including a complimentary guide to the best street food in Kuching. This means you get to stuff your face with delicious food and try all those delicious snacks that you wouldn't otherwise try!
Why This Offer?
Because I want you to have a memorable trip, not just a meh one. Because Kuching is amazing, and you deserve to experience it. This offer might make it a bit more appealing, but the real secret is to love Kuching, and have a fantastic time.
To Claim Your Offer:
- Book directly through the hotel website.
- Mention the secret code word: "Hornbill Adventures" at checkout!
- Enjoy your Kuching escape!
Good luck, and happy travels! (And if you go, please tell me about the buffet!)
Escape to Paradise: SNP House Airport Hotel & Restaurant Awaits!
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because we're diving headfirst into the glorious, slightly chaotic, and utterly unforgettable experience that was my trip to the Memoire Hornbill Hotel in Kuching, Sarawak. This isn't your perfectly polished travel blog post; this is the raw, unfiltered truth, scribbled down in between fits of laughter (and possibly a small amount of existential dread).
The Memoire Hornbill Hotel: Kuching Chronicle - A Journey Through My Sanity (and Possibly My Stomach)
Day 1: Arrival, Mild Confusion, and the Mystery of the Missing Toothpaste
Time: 9:00 AM - 12:00 PM: Arrive at Kuching International Airport. Oh, the humid embrace of Sarawak! It's like getting hugged by a warm, slightly damp cloud. Immediately, I was sweating. Gracefully, I might add. Actually, let's be real, I looked like I'd just run a marathon.
Event: Hotel Transfer: The taxi driver, bless his soul, spoke about as much English as I speak fluent Mandarin (spoiler alert: zero!). We communicated through frantic hand gestures and my increasingly stressed-out facial expressions. Reached the hotel, relieved.
Observation: Firstly, the lobby of the Memoire Hornbill is stunning. Like, Instagrammable as hell. All sleek lines and that distinct, vaguely tropical smell that instantly tells you you're on vacation. Checked in, got my keycard, and felt that familiar thrill of unbridled optimism that only a hotel room holds.
Imperfection: Unpacked. Realized I’d forgotten toothpaste. Yep, the essential. Right then, I realized that my perfect trip was slightly messy, just as I expected. What is a trip without forgetting something?
Rambling: The room was lovely, clean and spacious and the bathroom was gorgeous. The view looked out over the city. I wanted to rush out and explore the city. But wait…No toothpaste.
Time: 1:00 PM - 3:00 PM: Lunch at the hotel restaurant.
Event: Ordered the Sarawak Laksa. This is a big deal, people. This is the reason I came.
Quirky Observation: God, that Laksa. It's a symphony of flavors! Spicy, creamy, tangy, fishy… It's like a party in your mouth, and everyone's invited. My tastebuds genuinely did a little dance. However, I'm pretty sure I got some Laksa on my shirt. Again.
Emotional Reaction: Pure, unadulterated joy. This Laksa was almost worth the flight across the world. It was worth everything.
Imperfection: Somehow managed to spill some Laksa down my front. My shirt is now a Laksa canvas.
Time: 3:00 PM - 6:00 PM: Decided that I will find toothpaste! Stroll to the nearest convenience store.
Event: It's too hot to walk and I hate it. The sun is beating down on me.
Quirky Observation: Decided to buy a sun hat from one of the street vendors, this hat looks ridiculous.
Emotional Reaction: It's too hot, but I love it.
Imperfection: The guy gave me the wrong change, and I couldn't tell. Also, I was now wearing a sun hat.
Rambling: Found the shop, bought the toothpaste, but I wasn't sure if it was the right one. It had a picture of teeth on it. That was enough.
Time: 6:00 PM - 8:00 PM: Evening exploration - walking the Kuching Waterfront.
Event: Walked along the waterfront, soaked in the atmosphere, and watched the sunset.
Quirky Observation: The colors of the sunset were insane. Like, cotton candy made of fire. Absolutely stunning.
Emotional Reaction: I was falling in love with Kuching.
Imperfection: I definitely got lost for a bit.
Rambling: Ended the day with a stroll along the Kuching Waterfront. The air was thick with the scent of the river and the promise of adventure. I couldn't help but feel a bubbling sense of excitement at the prospect of exploring more of this wonderful city.
Day 2: Culture Shock, Sticky Rice, and a Bat Sanctuary (Yes, Really)
Time: 8:00 AM - 12:00 PM: Breakfast at the hotel.
Event: Did all of the above, and ate some local food.
Quirky Observation: The buffet was an adventure. Like, a delicious, slightly bewildering adventure. I tried everything. Probably should have skipped the durian (a fruit that smells like gym socks exploded).
Emotional Reaction: I hate the durian. I love pretty much everything else.
Imperfection: Spilled coffee down my front. Again.
Rambling: Wandered around the restaurant, my eyes bigger than my stomach. Tried the sticky rice, which was incredible.
Time: 1:00 PM - 4:00 PM: A dip in the hotel pool and some serious chilling.
Event: Floating around in the pool, people-watching.
Quirky Observation: Watching families play by the pool.
Emotional Reaction: Absolute bliss.
Imperfection: The pool water was so cold.
Rambling: After my swim, I went back to the hotel room and sat on the balcony, enjoying the breeze.
Time: 4:00 PM - 6:00 PM: Visit to the Sarawak Cultural Village.
Event: Got on a bus.
Quirky Observation: The Cultural Village was like stepping back in time. I saw traditional longhouses, people making crafts. It was fascinating, but a little… staged? Like a really well-done theme park.
Emotional Reaction: A little disappointed, but still enjoyed the experience.
Imperfection: Got completely lost in the village.
Rambling: The Sarawak Cultural Village was a must-see, but a bit crowded.
Time: 6:00 PM - 8:00 PM: Dinner at a local restaurant.
Event: Sat inside a restaurant.
Quirky Observation: The food was amazing!
Emotional Reaction: I enjoyed every minute of it.
Imperfection: I didn't know what anything was.
Rambling: Everything seemed so new and exciting.
Day 3: The Big Letdown (And, Okay, Some Pretty Cool Bats)
Time: 8:00 AM-10:00 AM: Breakfast at the hotel.
Event: Ordered a full English breakfast. I was feeling homesick.
Quirky Observation: Looked around, and no one else was having this, it was a lonely experience.
Emotional Reaction: I was craving home.
Imperfection: I probably should have ordered the local food.
Rambling: I should have tried the local food. But I was craving home.
Time: 10:00 AM - 1:00 PM: Bako National Park.
Event: Travelled to the national park.
Quirky Observation: The journey was a nightmare.
Emotional Reaction: I wanted to get back to the hotel.
Imperfection: The ferry took hours.
Rambling: The ferry was a long journey, and it wasn't fun.
Time: 1:00 PM - 3:00 PM: Visit to a nearby cave.
Event: The cave did not live up to expectations.
Quirky Observation: The cave was disappointing.
Emotional Reaction: This was a waste of time.
Imperfection: My camera broke.
Rambling: I was disappointed as hell.
Time: 3:00 PM - 5:00 PM: Back to the hotel.
Event: Sat by the pool.
Quirky Observation: Everything was perfect.
Emotional Reaction: I felt so happy.
Imperfection: I was alone.
Rambling: I couldn't stop smiling.
Time: 5:00 PM - 7:00 PM: The finale - the Bat Sanctuary! (I told you!)
Event: The most incredible thing I have ever done.
Quirky Observation: This was the highlight of the trip.
Emotional Reaction: I was sobbing and emotional with a mixture of joy and fear.
Imperfection: I got lost again.
Rambling: Hundreds of thousands of bats emerging from a cave at dusk. They swirled and swirled and
Escape to Paradise: Memoire Hornbill Hotel - The Lowdown (and My Crazy Week!)
Okay, so, Memoire Hornbill Hotel... is it *actually* paradise? Or just cleverly marketed?
Alright, deep breaths. Paradise? Look, let's be real, I’ve seen some stuff. I’ve been to places that smelled exclusively of coconut and disappointment (don't ask). Memoire Hornbill? It's…pretty darn good. Actually. Yeah, I'd go that far. Stunning views, lush greenery literally crawling up the walls (in a good way!), and the pool? Glorious. Think postcard-worthy. But hold on, before I start rambling about the pool (it's a *thing*), it’s not *perfect*. More on that later, trust me.
What's the vibe? Is it all stuffy and formal, or something a bit more…chill?
Chill. Definitely chill. Okay, maybe "aspirational-chill." Like, they *want* it to be super laid-back, and mostly, they succeed. No one's going to look you up and down if you rock up to breakfast in your best (read: only) pair of clean shorts. I, uh, *may* have worn the same shirt two days in a row. Nobody batted an eyelid! It's more along the lines of elegant but welcoming. Don't get me wrong, there's a certain level of sophistication, but it's not suffocating. Unless you're me, and then I get *slightly* unnerved around fancy cutlery. I always feel like I'm doing it wrong.
The rooms... are they worth the price tag? I'm on a budget, you know..
Ah, the million-dollar question (or, you know, however much it costs). Look, I’m a bargain hunter by nature. I once haggled for a mango at a roadside stall until the poor vendor looked like he was about to cry. So, yeah, I get it. The rooms are lovely. Really, *really* lovely. Spacious, clean (major points!), with those floor-to-ceiling windows for the views… Honestly, yes, they are *generally* worth it, especially if you can swing a good deal. Do a bit of digging, compare prices. But, be warned. You might NOT want to leave.
Anecdote Time! My first room? Glorious. Panoramic views, a bathtub bigger than my actual apartment (exaggerating... slightly). Then, disaster struck. The air conditioning decided to have an existential crisis and spew lukewarm air. I called reception… and felt like *such* a whiner. They fixed it fast, though! Plus, they upgraded me to a *superior* room (with a balcony, naturally). So, there’s that. It *does* happen.
What about the food? Is it all bland hotel fare? I need good eats!
Bland? Heaven forbid! The food is… *fantastic*. Honestly. Breakfast buffet? Prepare to weep with joy. I'm not exaggerating. There are about a million options! From the usual suspects to local delights like Sarawak Laksa (do NOT miss it). The lunch and dinner restaurants? Again, top-notch. I, um, may have overeaten. Several times. Forget diets… embrace the deliciousness. The only downside? My bank account. And my expanding waistline.
Rant Alert! Okay, so the *only* thing I'd nitpick? The bar snacks. They were… well, a bit boring. Crisps and peanuts? Come on, Memoire! Up your game!
Okay, the pool. You mentioned the pool… Spill! Is it as amazing as it looks?
The pool. Oh, the pool. Where do I even *begin*? Let me tell you… it's the thing that will bring me back. It's the stuff of dreams. Okay, picture this: Infinity edge. Crystal-clear water. Overlooking the lush, green landscape. Palm trees swaying gently. Cocktail in hand. (Essential.) And the *silence*! Seriously, pure bliss. I spent hours in that pool. Days, really. I think I shed a tear when I had to leave. (Don't judge.)
Confession Time: I may have gotten sunburnt to a crisp. Twice. I forgot to reapply sunscreen. Dumb move. But even that couldn't ruin the experience. It was that good.
What's the WiFi like? I need to stay connected, unfortunately.
Okay, here's a practical one. The WiFi is… mostly good. Except, and I'm being honest here, it went a bit haywire one morning when I *really* needed to upload some photos of the pool (priorities!). But it usually works well enough. You get the occasional blip, but on the whole, it was reliable. Not as strong as the emotional connection I made with that pool, mind you, but good enough.
Is the hotel close to the city center? Easy to get out and explore?
It's…a bit outside the city. Not crazy far, but you’ll need a taxi or a Grab. Which, I suppose, is a good thing if you want to escape the hustle and bustle. Kuching is a lovely city, by the way! Make time to explore the waterfront, the markets, and try some of the local food. I did it and I think I missed it, and now I'm sad I didn't have more time to get up to it.
Quirky Observation: The taxi drivers are… interesting. They all have their own stories. One guy told me the entire history of his pet cat. Another one sang to me in what I *think* was Malay folk music. It's all part of the adventure.
Any downsides? (Besides my budget and a potential sunburn)
Alright, honesty time. Besides the slightly weak bar snacks and the occasional WiFi hiccup, there were a few *minor* things. The gym was a little… well, small. And the service, while mostly excellent, was sometimes a *touch* slow during peak times. But honestly? Those are just niggles. Tiny, insignificant blips. I wouldn't want to deter you from going. I’m just being real here. And maybe, just maybe, I'm trying to find *something* to complainBook Hotels Now
